The Royal Navy was left angry, disappointed and red-faced after it came to light that a 13-year-old professional Call of Duty player had quit school and retired from the Warzone pro circuit over a hoax. The boy in question, Dan from Dundee, had actually been the victim of a bizarre catfishing prank. He was under the impression that he had been recruited by the Royal Navy due to his exceptional skills on the battlefield when outnumbered. However, it turns out that an online friend of his, 12-year-old Chris, had been the one behind it the whole time.
“At first I did have my doubts over the legitimacy of the Snapchat message, but the officer just seemed so impressed with my kill/death ratio,” Dan said when asked for comment. “I was under the impression I would be leading an off-the-books mission that would take us behind enemy lines. Ever since the adaptive triggers and haptic feedback were made available on the PlayStation 5 I have known I was ready to take the next step into real combat”.
The bizarre ruse came undone when Dan turned up at his local base trying to call the shots. Officer McTavish declined a full interview but stated “It’s not the proudest moment we’ve had recently. Obviously the kill/death ratio is impressive, but Dan doesn’t currently meet the height requirement to hold an automatic weapon”. We have added him on PSN and plan to monitor his progress while hoping he has a growth spurt real soon”.
-Craig ✌️
